About

What I do

I help second generation Asian American women, especially but not limited to Filipinas, feel seen for who they are, do what they absolutely love, and feel successful according to their own terms.

There’s a lot of pressure to save face and not bring shame to your family, but that can come at the expense of you fulfilling your own happiness.

When you think about it, the most important aspects of your life are decided without your input. What is shameful, what isn’t. What is perfect, what isn’t. What is success, what isn’t. What a respectable career is, what isn’t.

I help you define all this for yourself in a way that EMPOWERS you. Your voice. Your expectations. Your success.

• You’re the boss of your success and create it to on your own terms.

• You envision and dream a life that’s absolutely fulfilling to you, and we work on making it happen.

• You set the expectations in a way that sets you up for success.
• You get listened to and acknowledged for who you are.

Who am I?

I’m Lydia Cabasco. Hello.

How I got here

Community has always been at the center of every worthwhile idea I’ve ever wanted to pursue. My parents immigrated from the Philippines in the 1960’s and being no different from other Asian immigrants, once they got up and running with their lifelong jobs they took off for suburbia in the never ending quest for a bigger and better shiny house. As a result, I grew up in an all white north Seattle suburb, as one of a handful of kids of color in school. It sucked. Royally.

In my past life I was a grassroots community organizer. I worked on some big projects, but the focus was on outer change without a lot of thought on healing and transformation from within. I burned out and went to a few meditation retreats, worked with a few healers, and that started me on a path of healing as a way to make change.

I worked in several administrative jobs that I hated and worked for even more incompetent managers. One job had a perk that allowed me to become a Certified Professional Coach.

When it came to figuring out who I want to coach, I realized that stories common not only to me, but other Filipino-Americans and other Asian Americans wanted to be told. There isn’t a lot of space or support for us to look at or talk about the internal aspects of our experiences, our feelings, failures, challenges, struggles, fears, and the less than perfect aspects of ourselves, our families, and our communities. Now, I blog about them.

I tell stories about my experience as a second generation Filipino-American, but they aren’t unique only to my culture. They are common stories that any second generation Asian American can relate to.

Why I do what I do

Several articles and a study have been published over the last year and a half about the rise of depression and suicide rates among second generation Asian American women, especially Chinese and Filipinas. Much of this is attributed to the unbearable pressure that second generation Asian Americans experience to succeed and be perfect. I believe the red flags in our communities will become more severe if we don’t start doing something about it.

I also know how painful it is to not be acknowledged for who you are and to have all these outside expectations projected on to you, especially by immigrant parents. It’s especially painful when nothing is ever good enough and you feel like a failure as a result. I don’t want other second generation Asian American women to ever go through the depression and lack of self-worth, and the self doubt that I went through. There is too much talent and potential out there among Asian American women for it to be shot down by the pressure to succeed, feeling inadequate, or not being seen or acknowledged.

Random and juicy

I’m an artist. I started in photography and turned down prestigious art schools because I didn’t think I was good enough. I don’t regret the course my life has taken and I know not pursing what I’m passionate about is a bad recipe for disaster. I love to paint and create installations when I can, and I love dance. I take an adult beginner ballet class once a week and want to take contemporary classes too.

Claiming and accepting myself as an artist was difficult and I never thought of myself as one for many, many years.

I associate numbers with colors, something I thought everyone did, but apparently not. It’s a condition called synesthesia.

I have dreams of being in an all girl j-pop band as bassist or drummer and vocals.

Being from Seattle, I’m an obsessive recycler and composter.